I think I might just die of laughter. As I munched on food like a stoner while watching a Lord of the Rings Marathon on TNT yesterday, I saw the most hilarious commercial.
I want a pygmy giraffe. And I really can't top that so I'm just going to get on with my letters.
Dear Woman in the Bathroom- I have found that checking for feet under the stall door is a solid and efficient way of checking for occupancy. I less than enjoyed our eye contact through the crack of the stall door.
Dear Chocolate Covered Espresso Beans- you are my only exception to my training diet. Antioxidants... that's my justification.
Dear Beige Strapless Dress- I've been wondering why when I wear you, people tend to look at me when I drive. Then I realized it probably looks like I'm naked.
Dear Broken Sunglasses- I'm really not that upset about you. Love em' Break em' Buy new ones.
Dear Feet- you think you hate me now, but you are in for a much worse hell than you think. 3 months till the half marathon and 200 training miles to go
Dear Guys- I don't expect you to understand or be able to appreciate what I'm about to say.
Dear Strapless Bra- I can literally feel my chest gasping for air when I take you off.
Dear 7AM Runners- I'd be lying if I said I didn't get just a little bit of enjoyment out of knowing I did same thing as you, just 2 hours ago. Call me cocky.
Dear Future Son- I apologize for your childhood ridicule in advance, but I have decided to name you Basil. And it will be your first name, not your middle name.
Dear Bachelorette "Slumber Party"- who knew the word lube could cause such giggle fits. You might be my first and last "Slumber Party".
Dear Jimmy Johns, Taco Bell, Gatorade, Granola Bar, Twizzlers, and Chocolate Coffee Beans- who knew you could mix so well together? You really don't.
LoveAlways,
Gnarleigh
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